Hello everyone! Glad to be back home after a wonderful beach vacation. I’m still tying to catch up on all the episodes I missed, but thanks to your ass-toot commentary here on the blog I’m not totally clueless about all the shen-Annie-gans that have been going on in Pine Valley while I was soaking up the sun. I still have two weeks of old episodes to wade through. From what I have seen so far, I would borrow a phrase from Ashley and request "less shit, more shinola please" from TPTB. Remember when Pine Valley was a nice place to live? It's been a long time since people could just lounge around privately in their living rooms without getting killed, have a private conversation anywhere, or enjoy an afternoon drink at a trendy bar without getting shanked in the bathroom. One minute you're swilling a Cosmo and the next you're bleeding out your ass. And wherever you go, something or someone could strike you in the head at any moment! Crazy people are everywhere! With guns and ammo! The town is riddled with pimps and ho's. And *do not* have sex with people in Pine Valley! Seriously, you may think you're privately shagging one person, but soon the whole town will be pregnant, everyone's on Montel taking paternity tests, and you find out somebody else made a videotape of the act! And don't even try walking around naked in your own Pine Valley home because the entire town may be peeping in your windows or walk in unannounced at any moment! That is sooooo embarrassing! Enid and Phoebe would be horrified at what our little community has become!
Ok, I know you were all hoping to find a new podcast with Ashley and Jordan, but instead you got a blog post from me—sort of like finding a nice little half shell on the beach instead of the massively beautiful conch shell you hoped to discover instead. (I really did have a great time at the beach!). Honestly, JordAsh planned to do a podcast this week, but just couldn’t quite make it come together in time. I’ve got my fingers crossed that next week they will return from hiatus. I’d type more, but it’s hard to do with my fingers crossed. Let’s hear what you have to say, right here.